I don’t sing in the shower but this morning, for some reason, a few songs came to mind as possible candidates for rewrites:

• Alan Titchmarch joins the Bee Gees for “You should be gardening”:

I plant my bulbs at midnight,
Water them at dawn.
My sunflowers will grow higher,
I’ve got the neatest lawn.

What you doin with that hoe?
What you doin with that hoe?
You should be gardening, yeah
Gardening, yeah.

• Toto’s “Rosanna” as a worship song: “Hosanna”. Fill in the rest as desired.
• Men at Work’s “Land Down Under”, chorus:

Do you come from a land of panto?
Makes more sense in Esperanto.
It’s quite rare for our songs to scan, so
You better cheer, you better sing louder.

I couldn’t think of many rhymes for “panto”. But the last line isn’t supposed to rhyme anyway: the original has “under”, “plunder”, “thunder”, and “take cover”.

I know, I know. They’re all a bit pants. But it kept me occupied for the duration of the shower, which wasn’t particularly long.

In other news: yesterday, I discovered Google’s Calculator feature. You type into Google something like:
9.8 metres per second per second * 80 kg
and it comes back with the answer, with the right units:
(9.8 ((meters per second) per second)) * 80 kg = 784 newtons

I suppose I’d better go and see if I can be helpful in preparing Christmas dinner. Though it’s quite possible that my offer will be refused on the grounds that I’ll just get in the way… which would suit me fine! ;-)

This entry was posted on Monday, December 25th, 2006 at 12:54 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.